The Gentle Ways of a King

The God We Can Talk to

David moves me with his hesitance to take control of things.  I see it in the phrase so often used of him, "David inquired of the Lord."  Even though David had been anointed king by Samuel, even though God had dealt with Saul, even though the opportunity seemed right with an opening for a king, "David inquired of the Lord." (2 Samuel 2:1)  David knew that hearing God was more than just grabbing a word from him and doing whatever seemed right.  He knew that the Lord not only has a truth to give, but also a way of seeing it carried out.

At the heart of the way of the Lord is communication and relationship.  In David I see that God doesn't just want someone to follow orders nor someone afraid to do anything on his own (David did not alway inquire directly), but someone who would talk and share and obey him from his heart.  This was conversation, which comes out so well in David's prayers:

O you who hear prayer,
  to you all men will come.

You answer us with awesome deeds of righteousness,
  O God our Savior
the hope of all the ends of the earth
  and of the farthest seas.

You care for the land and water it
  you enrich it adundantly.
The streams of God are filled with water
  to provide the people with grain,
  for so you have ordained it.

(Psalm 65:2, 5, 9)

David's God hears.  He answers.  He cares and provides.  Such is the One David asks.  Do I inquire of this hearing, answering, caring God or just complain at him?

God Next Door

 When God answers David in 2 Samuel 2, I find that God is not always - maybe even not generally - forceful.  Instead of installing David as king immediately, he instructs David to enter the land of those who will support him initially, the kingdom of Judah.  God moves in next door to the rest of Israel to call and invite them rather than force their cooperation.

Such is the way of Jesus and his church.  God moves into communities, workplaces, offices, and homes, so he can be next door to others.  Jesus became the friend and neighbor of sinners before he became their savior.  He does not push, he wants to invite.

David continues to show the God's kindness by starting his reign slowly, but also with blessing.  He honors those people who have honored God by their care for Saul, the Lord's anointed.  "The Lord bless you," says David.  (2 Samuel 2:5)  He follows the Lord's kindness with his own, almost as an afterthought.  He sees the kingdom as not belonging to Saul or himself, but to God.  He understands that he is the Lord's servant, blessing as he blesses.

This seems to be God's way.  The first thing he does to Adam is bless him (Genesis 1:28).  Similarly, Jesus begins his ministry with blessing as well (Matthew 5:3-12).  The Lord begins his reign with blessing, not threats or false promises.  How very unlike this world.  The quiet invitation goes out from David as well, but is supported by the truth, "the house of Judah has anointed me king over them."  The Lord's blessing is inseparable from his rule.  What do I think of a God that moves in next door to me and announces his blessing on me?  How do I feel about that?  Does it move me to ask of him or to discount him?

The Response of Threatened Desires

I suppose that such gentleness from the Lord as shown in David brings some people to think they can somehow avoid or take advantage of him.  This is the way of the flesh and the way of the world.  Rather than accept David's kingship, Abner gathers a rebellion.  Perhaps he appealed to the lineage of Saul or the traditions of typical kingdoms that continue rule in this way.  Perhaps he really believed that David would not be good to him.  Probably at the heart of it, Abner wanted to maintain and increase his position of honor and power no matter what.

In defiance of God's gracious invitation shown by coming alongside and announcing his blessing, the flesh controlled by desire sees only a threat to its position.  Above all else, it will not submit.  When desire controls the flesh, it gathers its own resources to operate without God, which always ends up being against God.  There is nowhere else to go.  With God's invitation, there is always a challenge because he allows it.  How eager am I to retain or bolster my life and position in this life?  Does God's invitation to rule with blessing bring relief or resistance in me?

The Cost of Resistance

This challenge is the cost that God decided to bear.  In order to let people do (and see) what they want he orchestrates such situations which will winnow the wheat from the chaff.  The cost for David is a battle between brothers, a civil conflict within Israel.  I imagine David may have been tempted to think it could have gone better if he has seized control outright and quelled any resistance.  But this is not God's way.  It was costly to David and his men to do it God's way, for the sake of God's goodness to everyone.

Although the cost is high, it is always much greater on the side of those who oppose God.  In this case, it came out in terms of casualties: David's men lost 19, while Abner's men lost 360  (2 Samuel 2:30).  Abner has to retreat an ask for mercy.  He is beaten and decides not to fight anymore.

As I come to follow Jesus, he says I must count the cost.  The first cost is what God paid for my freedom, for his goodness to be known to everyone including myself.  Then I must also count the cost of not following Christ.  A disciple of Jesus finds that the cost of losing righteousness, joy, and peace is much greater than the loss of sinful desire and status in the world.  While the world typically sees obedience as costly and sin as freeing, a disciple sees sin as costly and obedience as freeing.  When I count the cost, do I feel short-changed and cheated or like I've found a priceless hidden treasure?

I am amazed at how God longs to move in next door to us in order to come alongside us.  He announces blessing even as he announces his reign.  He allows the flesh, the world, and Satan to have their way for a time, so that we can see that we are indeed getting what we want and choose.  We see that his way is costly, but he is willing to pay the cost so that some might be saved.  Christ shows me a God who wants me to seek him and ask of him and be with him.

Strengthening Ourselves in the Lord

And when David and his men came to the city, they found it burned with fire, and their wives and sons and daughters taken captive. Then David and the people who were with him raised their voices and wept until they had no more strength to weep. David's two wives also had been taken captive, Ahinoam of Jezreel and Abigail the widow of Nabal of Carmel. And David was greatly distressed, for the people spoke of stoning him, because all the people were bitter in soul, each for his sons and daughters. But David strengthened himself in the Lord his God. (1 Samuel 30:3-6)

Give ear to my prayer, O God,

    and hide not yourself from my plea for mercy!

Attend to me, and answer me;

    I am restless in my complaint and I moan,

because of the noise of the enemy,

    because of the oppression of the wicked.

For they drop trouble upon me,

    and in anger they bear a grudge against me.

(Psalm 55:1-3)

Two Roads

All too often weeping and grieving turn into bitterness.  Bitterness turns into blame and blame into abuse.  Abuse often begins with the leadership.  This is the road that David's people took.

Quite simply the story shows something entirely different in David from his people.  The words "but David" is the story of a good leader, but even more importantly, a good person.  "But David" indicates that something else was at work in David that moved him from weeping and distress to strength and encouragement.  "But David" most remarkably shows that he was prepared in the midst of trial and trouble and persecution to do what his people were not prepared to do: seek God.  David was ready; his people were not.

David found his strength in God.  He did not have a series of religious activites that he would drop when he got stressed or when difficulties came.  He found encouragement in what he did.  Whatever practices David had were not stressful or "just one more thing to do";  they were life-giving.  They relieved his stress.  Spiritual practices when rightly practiced provide strength, encouragement, and relief.  They open up a pressure relief valve in a life well-trained in them.

Because of the many different influences around us, the idea of David strengthening himself probably brings up the wrong sort of picture.  If it's like most movies, David got mad and powerful enough to get even.  If it's like most self-help, David found his own truth and was "himself" in spite of everyone else.  If it's like most workplaces, David found someone to complain about or blame.  Such actions seem to bring a certain sort of strength from anger, but lead down a more dangerous road: pride and self-justification.

The Easier Way

David did strengthen himself, though.  Plainly, he could not deal with his situation on his own or in his own way, but he did have to take action.  He could not get pulled down into bitterness with his people.  Here is where soul-strengthening practices come in.  David strengthened himself because he knew he was weak and vulnerable and through practice knew what to do about it.  David strengthened himself because he knew no one would do it for him.  The easy yoke of life with God is not easy because it takes no effort, but because God always lifts the heavier load.

David's strengthening was "in the Lord."  He needed to reorient his focus to the Lord.  The beginning of David's practice is not with making the situation better, but refraining from making it worse.  Before he did something, he did nothing.  He retreated to God.  He knew that in the Lord he was safe and strong because he knew the Lord, so he pulled away from the situation and drew near to God.  David was warrior enough to know when he was threatened with defeat, so he found refuge in the Lord.  Such knowledge and ability does not usually come during trouble without some level of training.  Battle is not the time to learn to use your sword.  Prayers for help and guidance are important, but without the context of an interactive relationship with God, they are often abandoned.

Finally, David did not just find strength in the Lord, but "in the Lord his God."  It was not in the Lord Abraham's God, or in the Lord the priest's God or in the Lord Israel's God.  On this all spiritual practice stands.  Fundamentally, we cannot approach or depend on the Lord as someone else's God.  Perhaps the people wanted to stone David because they had come to rely too much on him and he failed them.  Perhaps they idolized him too much, so they sought their strength in David rather than God.  Perhaps one way of knowing who we have as our God is watching ourselves when we go for strength and encouragement in the midst of trouble and persecution.

David's Practice

We find a lot of information about the right practice of soul-building exercises in this little phrase about David: "But David strengthened himself in the Lord his God."  We find that such exercises prepare us to face grief and distress without falling into bitterness and blame.  We find them to be relief and strength rather than more stress in out lives.  We find them to be necessary effort we put out in response to God's ever-present grace

and strength.  We find them to be based in the knowledge of the Lord as a refuge and the source of our strength.  We find them to be effective only in the context of a personal relationship with the Lord our God.

We wonder what David actually did to strengthen himself.  Quite likely, he did what he had practiced so often.  He sang and worshiped and prayed.  What calmed Saul in his madness may have also calmed David in his own distress.  No wonder we are encouraged to do the same.  "Let the word of Christ dwell richly in you. . . as you sing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God." (Colossians 3:16)  Perhaps the word of Christ is not only what we might read in our Bibles, but also the praise of God we find coming from our own mouths, truly dwelling richly in us and breaking out in gratitude from us as we daily practice our trust in the Lord.

Hallowed

It is your name

Your name alone

that calls out to me

even as I call it out.

Not to me, not to me,

but to your name

be all the eyes and ears,

cries of joy, thankful tears.

Let the burden roll off my back

Into an empty tomb:

that weight off my frame,

that drudgery of my empty name.

When the sound of your name

fills my breath, passes my lips,

It is not just words, but your heart,

that entrances me into self-forgetfulness.

Your name, your name,

never the same.

Always teaching, always healing

always commanding, always walking beside.

Let it be your name,

your name alone,

that haunts my house

with its unseen presence 

of joy.

I dropped my name.

I let it fall,

when yours came by

and filled my sky 

with hope.

It is not the syllables, the sounds,

the tunes, the rhymes that make it live,

but finding you never more 

than a breath away

in your name.

I bury my face in your robes,

I touch the hand that touches me.

Can I say it without shame?

Can I speak it with truth and love?

Your name.

Life According to Jesus

Faith is not " believing in spite of evidence," nor "believing what you know isn't true," as some have cynically suggested.  Rather it is an open-eyed adventurous affirmation that in and through things is a Good Will, and that Good Will is God.  Therefore faith relates itself to that Good Will by betting its life on it.  (E. Stanley Jones, Is the Kingdom of God Realism?)

WORRISOME STORIES ABOUT LIFE

Two false stories about life cause a great deal of worry.  The first is that life is about sowing and reaping.  Planning and results.  Doing and getting.  Although we do know that life has definite cause/effect chains, this is not what life is about; it is not the whole story.  "Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy."  (Ps. 126)  There is an incongruency about life.  We do not always get what we deserve.  We thank God for it.

Another false story is that life can be "stored away in barns."  Somehow we can save up for later.  We work so we can retire.  We save so we can spend.  We do good so that good will be done to us.  Although we are encouraged to "store up our treasures in heaven," the reason is not so we can get to them later, but because where our treasures are, that's where our heart is.  "I said to the Lord, 'You are my Lord; apart from you I have no good thing."  (Ps. 16:2)  Life must be lived and cannot be kept for later.  Many things are best left behind anyway.

THE BIRDS' STORY

The birds live the true story of life by instinct.  "Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns and yet your heavenly Father feeds them."  (Mt. 6:26)  Life is about being fed.  The birds are not fed if they remain still, but they do not worry.  They do not live the "sowing/reaping" story nor the "storing away in barns" story.  They live the story of being fed.  What the birds do naturally, we must do by faith and choice.

Life is more important than eating and drinking.  It is more important than sowing and reaping and storing away in barns.  Life is about hungering, but not for food.  Life is about thirsting, but not for drink.  "I am the bread of life." (Jn, 6:35)  "The water I give to him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life."  (Jn. 4:14)  Life is about hungering and thirsting for Christ and being satisfied by him.  Not just by what he said or what he did, but by him.  It is about our daily bread.  It is about the heavenly manna that spoils if it is not eaten that day.  (Ex. 6:13-23; Jn. 6:32-33)

The systems of human life set up against Christ promote sowing and storing up.  Both stories are about a world of scarcity.  In such a world the first thing we think in the morning is how we didn't get enough sleep and the last thing is how we didn't get enough done.  Shame is the whip that keeps us going.  (Brene Brown, The Power of Vulnerability)  Conversely, life according to Jesus is set up on trust (faith).  We trust that there is enough time to finish what God has given us.  We trust that he will give us the resources to do so as we ask him.  Massive systems of propaganda speak against such trust.  Part of us rebels at the thought of such trust.  But it is before us, as plain at the birds in the air.

The Authentic God

I like the description "authentic" for good relationships.  They are not false or merely copied from somewhere else, but genuine and real.  Authentic relationships begin with authentic people.  And yet, authentic people begin with authentic relationships as well.  It is something caught and taught, not inherited.

Parents and family can help us on that path or set up barriers.  Usually, it is a bit of both.  They can only give what they have.  Often, they are not so bad as they are limited.  They are fallen, but they are also human.

This is where God comes in.  Authenticity begins with him.  "I am that I am."  He is the only completely self-reliant, self-initiating, self-directing being.  He is real and genuine without qualification.

Even more amazing is that God has in himself authentic relationship: Trinity.  He *is* loving community.  In that sense, the revelation that "God is love" in Christianity is so remarkable.  He is not merely loving toward people, but also can be called them - the persons of the Trinity - loving each other.

As "heady" as all this is, it provides the only safe starting point for authentic relationships.  Without first being included in the loving community of Trinity through Jesus, we will find loving each other impossible.  We will be drawn to other people in order to use or idolize them.  Even our marriages need a focal point other than just the other person - a mediator, if you will.

Biblically, we see this played out in the qualifiers to the "one another" passages:  "Love one another as I have loved you",  "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ", ans so on.  The reason and motivation for our love is a relationship with God.  It fuels and informs all of our relationships.

Because of our love for God is the reason, if our relationships are not authentic, then it reflects back on our relationship with God.  "Forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us" is not so much of a threat as a fact.  As we live in the forgiveness of God, so we learn how to forgive each other.  Conversely, if we do not live with a forgiving God, we will not find ourselves particularly forgiving toward other people.

How we conceive of God affects our relationship with other people.  So much so that we can find our relationships with others as an indicator of how we are relating to God.  We start with those closest and often dearest, our neighbors, that is, the one who is "nigh" or near.  These relationships will inevitably give us a picture of how we are relating to God.

We become grounded in what is most real, genuine, and true by entering a relationship with Jesus, the doorway to the Trinity.  Authenticity is then caught and taught.  Such authenticity then begins to flavor our relationships, like salt.  It begins to shine out of our words and deeds, like light.

Confession, encouragement, service, true community worship, mutual guidance and other practices start off with practice, but then begin to naturally occur in our relationships with others because we want what is best for them, we actually love them.  Our "left hand does not know what our right hand is doing" because they have become thoroughly ingrained in our character instead of just practiced for religious purposes.

Then we are authentic.  Then we can be authentic with others.  Then authentic relationships become possible.