Space Versus Privacy

When you pray, you open yourself to the influence of the Power which has revealed itself as Love.  The Power gives you freedom and independence.  Once touched by this Power, you are no longer swayed back and forth by the countless opinions, ideas and feelings which flow through you.  You have found a center for your life that gives you a creative distance so that everything you see, hear and feel can be tested against the source.  Christ is the man who in the most revealing way made clear that prayer means sharing in the power of God.  It enabled him to turn his world around, it gave him the attraction to draw countless men out of the chains of their existence, but it also stirred up aggression which brought him to his death.  Christ, who is called the Son of Man and the Son of God, has shown what it means to pray.  In him, God himself became visible for the fall and rise of many.  (Henri Nouwen, With Open Hands)

One of my favorite images for solitude is sitting in a wide open place.  I grew up near to a canyon and always loved to be near that wide open place.  Vacationing in the Northwest was beautiful, but I would find it hard to be so enclosed in trees since I am so used to the open.  My drive to work goes by a large caldera, an open meadow in the midst of mountain peaks.  I also have enjoyed the desert for its loneliness and openness.

In some of my prayer times, I settle down into an open inner space where I can hear God and leave distractions behind.  When Nouwen talks about a creative space, this is what comes to mind.  Solitude and silence are typical ways in which God can meet people.  I see them as space and openness.  Distractions and temptations crowd me, but God doesn't.  It seems to be in his nature to work in these spaces.

It takes space to make a person.  The space is not mere privacy, separation for other people so I can do what I want to, when I want to.  Privacy makes emptiness.  Most of the things I do in privacy are soul-destroying.  Instead of privacy, I need space, open and inviting.  I need to make room in my life to really be with people.  This takes time alone, but not privacy.

More importantly, such space invites God to speak and teaches me to hear him.  Privacy shuts God out with the clamor of my desires, distractions, and worries.  I need prayer that is open to God's influence, open to his touch.  Such prayer occurs where I make space for God.  It is interesting to me how quickly a "quiet time" can become a private thing in the worst sense instead of a creative distance where I can hear and be heard.  I stand apart and alone so I can learn to draw near without pretending, pushing, or presuming.

Some of the most acetic people in history, the Desert Fathers, understood the concept of space versus privacy.

A brother came to see a certain hermit and, as he was leaving, he said,"Forgive me, Abba, for preventing you from keeping your rule." The hermit replied, "My rule is to welcome you with hospitality and to send you away in peace." (Desert Fathers)

 Creating space does not make friends necessarily.  Not everyone will be happy with such an effort.  Space does create compassion, however.  It is a city on a hill.  It is what makes followers of Jesus into "stars in the universe."  I think that 5 minutes with someone who has real openness in their life is worth many hours with someone who has a crowded, driven life.  The sacrifice is worth it.

Creating space begins with understanding that God has space for me.  "The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in love."  (Psalm 103:8)  "Love is patient."  (1 Corinthians 13:4) When I begin to live in that space, that patient love, I begin to allow such space for other people as well.  I find room for myself when walk into the wide open space of God's love and power.  I find room for myself when I do not crowd other people.  How often do I draw near to other people to pretend I am something I am not, push them into what I think is best for them, or presume that they should see me a certain way?

Lord, I need space.  Deliver me from my tendency to try find space by taking it from other people.  Instead let me find the openness of your arms and the quiet of your gaze.  Let me live under your eye and in your heart, open to what you have for me today.  Amen.