About Me

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I long to see Christ formed in me and in those around me. Spiritual formation is my passion. My training was under Dallas Willard at the Renovare Spiritual Formation Institute. One of my regular prayers is this: "This day be within and without me, lowly and meek, yet all powerful. Be in the heart of each to whom I speak, and in the mouth of each who speaks unto me."

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Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Ripening to God's Word

The listening ear and the satisfied heart
       grow in the same soil.
       That soil is the kingdom of God.
       The place where the ear and heart are married.

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I see seeds in my hand
         waiting to be sown,
         waiting to be grown,
         life waiting to happen.
In my hand, in my possession,
          they will come to nothing,
          remain only seeds,
          only fit for lesser creatures,
          barely able to feed a bird -
          only seeds,
                           ears without heart.
They touch the earth.
        Then their life is kindled.
        To what they have more is given:
              a stalk,
                 a head,
                    a full kernel in the head,
                       ripeness.

How can those seeds of listening produce such a crop?
                        They grow by loving desire, unseen, underground.
                        They grow in sleep or in waking,
                                             during night or in the day.
                        And so listening brings fruit
                                    by this kingdom of God,
                        All by itself seemingly -
                             this true listening,
                             listening with all my heart.
                        My Jesus, your words are life;
                                        let me hear!


These seeds do not grow all at once:
          First the stalk,
                  then the head,
                         then the kernel in the head,
                                then ripeness.
In growth is the waiting,
    one thing upon another,
    experience with experience,
    life within life.

Listening is waiting
                  waiting for ripeness.
So much is green in my heart
                  unable the sustain what I hear.
                  I long for ripeness.

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Lord,
        send a sickle to my heart,
                an apostle to reap the fruit of listening.
                Only then will my heart be satisfied.
        If only my heart would ripen to your word!
        If only the seeds of listening would bear fruit!
                        Something so small becomes the biggest of all,
                        the rejected stone, the capstone,
                        the Suffering Servant, the Savior,
                        the unknown man, the Teacher of all.
                        My Jesus and my little life in him.

(Meditation on Mark 4:26-29)

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